Tag: Unforgiveness

Jonah: A Reluctant Servant

THE THEME OF THE Book of Jonah is simple: The LORD is a God of boundless compassion, not just for “us” but for “them”—the wicked, the disobedient, the Jew, and the Gentile. Some scholars consider Jonah’s story to be an allegory, using fictional characters to symbolize theological principles. Specifically, some believe “Jonah” represents Israel in its refusal to carry God’s mission to “other nations.” No doubt Israel felt “chosen” and was reluctant to share its status with others. But Jonah is identified as an actual historical figure (see 2 Kings 14:25); his story has elements of prophetic narrative like those of Elijah and Elisha (1Kings). Jesus likened His own impending death and resurrection to what Jonah experienced when swallowed by a giant fish and regurgitated on the beach after three days and three nights (see Matt. 12:40-41).

God’s Sovereign Control

God is sovereign over everything, as expressed in Scripture. He is King, Supreme Ruler, Designer, Lawgiver of the universe. He is sovereign over events on Earth, as expressed in Scripture. God’s sovereignty is infinite, but He cannot will or do anything that is against His character. Grudem writes, “God cannot lie, sin, deny himself, or be tempted with evil. He cannot cease to exist, or cease to be God, or act in a way inconsistent with any of his attributes” (1). We have been given a portion of God’s power—mental, spiritual, persuasion, authority. Grudem writes, “…when we remember that the sum of everything that is desirable or excellent is found in infinite measure in God himself, then we realize that it could not be otherwise: whatever excellence there is in the universe, whatever is desirable, must ultimately have come from him, for he is the Creator of all and he is the source of all good” (2) (italics in original).

David decreed, “The LORD has established his throne in the heavens, and his kingdom rules over all” (Psa. 103:19, ESV). David would often pray, “Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O LORD, and you are exalted as head above all” (1 Chron. 29:11). Jeremiah said to God, “Ah, Lord GOD! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you” (Jer. 32:17). Paul said of Christ, “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us” (Eph. 3:20).

God’s Determination

The Book of Jonah shows God’s determination to make sure His will is carried out. Jonah finds out first hand what can happen when we tell God no! Jonah was unwilling to go to Nineveh, so he tried running away. We know from Genesis 3 that hiding from God is impossible. God knew precisely where Adam and Eve were hiding in the Garden when He asked, “Adam, where are you?” I believe God was saying, Adam, consider where you are compared to where you were before you disobeyed Me. Adam and Eve decided to eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil so they could know as God knows; to look within themselves to determine what is good and what is evil; to decide the meaning of life. At that point, man lost his “vertical” (heavenward) orientation with God, exchanging it for a “horizontal” orientation (within and between self and others). Indeed, the number of worldviews is as varied as those who hold them.

When Jonah was thrown into the angry sea by the superstitious crew, they put him back in the path of God’s will. God’s plan will always be accomplished. Whenever God calls on us to “go forth” and perform a task, He begins with a single request. He told Jonah, Go to Nineveh. Any “call” to mission from God is a heavy obligation. Because we are not equipped to comprehend God’s plan all at once, He reveals it to us one step at a time. If God were to reveal the entire journey up front, we would not need faith in Him to equip us for the mission. God says, I know where I am sending you. Trust me and I will get you there. His determination must become our determination. Consider how Jesus was determined to accomplish God’s purpose (a plan for redemption) regardless of what it would cost—humiliation, severe physical pain, mocking, (temporary) separation from the Father (see Matt. 27:46), and death. Crucifixion is so gruesome the Romans coined the phrase excruciate to define the punishment: ex meaning “out of” and cruciate meaning “from the cross.” To excruciate is “to cause great agony or torment” by nailing someone to a cross. It is a slow and agonizing death. Christ willingly paid the wages of our sin. We have a plan of redemption because of the unwavering resolve that characterized His entire life.

Determination gives you the resolve to keep going in spite of the roadblocks that lay before you. 

Determination is our ability to make difficult decisions and accomplish God’s goals based on the truths of God’s Word without regard for what may be encountered. It is the ability to set ourselves toward Godly pursuits and not allow ourselves to be distracted or discouraged. “Put false ways far from me and graciously teach me your law! I have chosen the way of faithfulness; I set your rules before me. I cling to your testimonies, O LORD; let me not be put to shame” (Psa. 119:29-31). Paul wrote, “Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Phil. 3:13-14). Jesus told the disciples, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God” (Luke 9:62). Proverbs says, “Commit your work to the LORD, and your plans will be established (italics added).”

We often hear about the determination of men and women in the mission fields of the world. Mattew Egwowa, of the Ibru Ecumenical Centre, writes, “The syndrome of waiting for God is an old syllabus of the classical believers, but now is an emergence of end time radical believers—the revolutionists: Enough is enough. Such movement begins with a determination; and the launching pad is courage. Courage is despising danger and braving the risk to achieve your goal” (3). Determination is carried on the wings of necessity. It must fly in the face of fear. God said, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isa. 41:10). Egwowa says, “Until fear goes, God cannot come to your aid [and you] cannot tract the supernatural intervention of the Almighty God; fear must leave for faith in God.” In other words, the determined man must not only be fearless, but must also be soundly rooted in faith. Jonah’s strongest objection to bringing the message of repentance and forgiveness to the Ninevites was his hatred for the Assyrians.

The Need for Repentance

The need for repentance is universal and is not bound by time, geography, nationality, race, or culture. God prepared to destroy the ancient city of Nineveh because of its rabid sin. It had become as evil as Sodom. As with Jonah, there are times when we might not want God to forgive those who have hurt us. Jonah hated the Ninevites, and he did not want them to be saved. Nineveh was the oldest and most populated city of the ancient Assyrian civilizations, located near the modern city of Mosul on the Tigris River. The Assyrian army sacked a number of cities, which included Jonah’s home town of Gath Hepher. He may have seen his mother and father slain and his siblings captured. He was not able to assuage his anger and resentment of Nineveh and the Assyrians under his own power. As Christians under the New Covenant, we understand God’s position on forgiveness. We struggle with forgiveness, but our salvation is rooted in it.

Unforgiveness is one of Satan’s powerful weapons. He knows it is impossible that no offenses should come (see Luke 17:10), so he sways us to anger and indignation. The Greek word for offense (adíkima) means “malpractice, wrong, tort, misdeed.” Interestingly, the NIV translation of 17:10 is, “Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, but woe to that person through whom they came.'” Jesus had been talking to the Pharisees since Luke 16:14. Now, however, He turned to the disciples. The Greek word that covers “things that cause people to sin” (skandala) means “traps,” but symbolically this includes anything that causes people to fall back into sin. Jesus said this trap is so egregious that “It would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble” (Luke 17:2). Remarkably, the “trap” of Jonah’s refusal to let go of the offense by the Assyrians caused him to sin by disobeying and God and running from His calling. God loves obedience more than sacrifices (see 1 Sam. 15:22). He expected Jonah to obey His command in spite of the anger and resentment he held against the Ninevites and Assyrians. And He expects our obedience in forgiving others.

Paul said in his second letter to Timothy, “And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will” (2 Tim. 2:24-26). The “snare of the devil” should be with the offending party, not with the one who is offended. It is human to react adversely to being wronged, but we are called to seek help from the Lord to let go of the offense, allowing the other party to “own it,” forgiving them in love and grace. This is why John Bevere divides all offended people into two categories: (a) those who have been treated unjustly, and (b) those who believe they have been treated unjustly (4).

I became so ensnared when my family refused reconcile with me after forty years of my active addiction, manipulation, lies, thefts, and defiance. My thought was, Hey, I mean it this time! Now, I have been clean for twenty-nine consecutive months, and I have completed a B.S. in Psychology and an M.A. in Theology. My daily mission is directed toward those who still struggle with active addiction and those who have quit and want to change their lives forever. My offense was great despite the truth of my behavior. I had in fact become unforgiving of their unforgiveness. Perhaps there is no trickier trap than “justifiable” anger. One of my mentors remarked that until I forgive my family members (e.g., of their unforgiveness), they cannot forgive me. It is a spiritual axiom that I was standing in the way of God’s blessing me with forgiveness and reconciliation from my mother and my siblings.

God’s Full Assurance

Many have wondered why God used Jonah to carry out His will after Jonah refused to go to Nineveh. Foremost, our LORD is the God of second chances. When God commanded Jonah to go to Nineveh, Jonah’s immediate reaction was, Oh no. Nope. Not going to Nineveh. In defiance, Jonah bought a ticket to the farthest place west that was known at the time—go any farther and you will sail off the edge of the planet. He went to “the end of the world” to escape God’s will. As he was on the boat, a tempest of severe weather struck the ship. The crew ultimately tossed Jonah overboard as a sacrifice hoping to calm the angry sea. Well, that’s the end of that, right? Jonah will surely perish and God will send someone else to deliver His message in Nineveh. Jonah 1:17 says, “Then God assigned a huge fish to swallow Jonah. Jonah was in the fish’s belly three days and nights” (MSG). I can only imagine Jonah’s state of mind while laying among partially digested food and stomach acid!

“I called out to the LORD, out of my distress and he answered me; out of the belly of Sheol I cried, and you heard my voice. For you cast me into the deep, into the hear of the seas, and the flood surrounded me; all your waves and your billows passed over me. Then I said, ‘I am driven away from your sight; yet I shall again look upon your holy temple.’ I went down to the land whose bars closed upon me forever; yet you brought up my life from the pit, O LORD my God. When my life was fainting away, I remembered the LORD, and my prayer came to you, into your holy temple. Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love. But I with the voice of thanksgiving will sacrifice to you; what I have vowed I will pay. Salvation belongs to the LORD'” (Jonah 2:2-9).

I find it noteworthy that Jonah knew for certain it was God who tossed him overboard in a tempest and had him swallowed by a giant fish. Jonah acknowledged God’s sovereignty when he said “your waves and your billows passed over me.” Jonah experienced utter darkness in the belly of the fish and got a taste of Sheol. And then, “The LORD spoke to the fish, and it vomited Jonah out upon the dry land” (Jonah 2:10). He was being given a second chance. Ever have one of those? Maybe more than one second chance? I’ve lost count of how many second chances God has given me over the decades. A friend of mine who owns a Christian bookstore reminded me that God casts our sins into the sea of forgetfulness. I don’t think this means God cannot “remember” what we have done, but it does mean our offenses have been forgiven and will not be “recalled” or held against us. We have been redeemed through Christ.

To illustrate that God has separated us from our sins as far as the east is from the west, my friend brought out a globe. “Take your fingers and walk west around the globe,” she said. She kept turning the globe, telling me to continue “walking” around the globe four times. Then she asked me, “As you walked toward the West, did you encounter the East?” I had not. Then she had me walk up the globe toward the north pole, and down the other side to the south pole. She said, “What happened regarding North and South?” Walking up the globe I encountered the North Pole, and as I walked down the other side I encountered the South Pole. I greatly appreciated the illustration.

The Mission; the Command

Here’s where the story comes down to “street level.” As Christians, we have a commission to go to every corner of the globe sharing the gospel and making disciples of all nations, baptizing them, and teaching them to follow all that Jesus taught the disciples (see Matt. 28:18-10). Why are we going in the opposite direction? When we get outside the will of God, we give in to our fear. We rationalize our actions (e.g., they probably won’t believe in Jesus!), or we say, “Let someone else go, I’m no missionary.” God sends whom He needs to send for each mission; the one who can best carry His message. Quite often what God needs to say in the situation can only come from the person He sends! Imagine how convinced Jonah was about God’s intentions after being regurgitated from the belly of the giant fish!

Chris Hoke wrote an amazing memoir (5) about his work as a minister to the homeless, migrant farmers, and prisoners. His experiences opened up a whole world where some lives seem to matter less than others: drug addicts, alcoholics, people suffering from mental illness, the incarcerated, the “illegal” alien. We need to erase margins that often stand in the way of inclusion—where the “demonizing” ceases and the “disposable” are no longer tossed aside. All people, even the most troubled, are worthy of a second chance. Why is it so easy to demonize people? What are we afraid will happen if we reach out and embrace the outcast? I had the nasty habit of judging people for most of my life. When I renewed my commitment to be “in the way” of Christ, I looked closely at this tendency and noted a need to promote or prop myself up at the expense of others. Coming back to Christ gave me at least a desire to put myself second and to stop judging others, but this character defect was deeply rooted and in need of “weeding.” Chris Hoke’s ministry to life’s “less than” individuals is refreshing.

Concluding Remarks

Jonah allowed his anger and resentment toward the Assyrians and the Ninevites to thwart his obedience to God. He no doubt felt “justified” having witnessed the Assyrians kill his parents and snatch his siblings. Perhaps Jonah was “left behind” to warn others to comply with the enemy or suffer the same fate as his family. This is a familiar theme in the first Star Wars movie. Luke Skywalker returns to his village to find it burned to the ground and his aunt and uncle murdered. It was at that moment that a darkness began to move in his soul. Luke tried to rush his “jedi” training so he could avenge his village and his aunt and uncle. Obi-Wan Kenobi taught Luke to calm his anger and search diligently for the “force.” Jonah was similarly blinded by hatred and resentment. These emotions are not fruit (“evidence”) of the Spirit at work in our lives, but are examples of the flesh controlling our actions.

We cannot hide from God. Once “called,” we will be pursued to whatever end we ultimately choose—stay or run. As with Christ Hoke, and with Jonah’s mission to Nineveh, God sends whom He needs to send for the circumstances at hand. God’s message could only be delivered by Jonah—ultimately, forgiveness and redemption. It is as if we’re to come away with the lesson, If Jonah could put aside his strong feelings against the Assyrians for murdering his parents and focus on performing God’s will, we can forgive those who have offended us and get on with our calling. God’s judgment might be “delayed,” but it will always be exercised. Nineveh’s repentance was short-lived, leading to their destruction 100 years later. God is jealous and avenging; slow to anger but mighty in power. Maybe there is a deeper message in the eventual destruction of Nineveh (and of the entire world). Jesus wants more than nominal “believers.” Believing in Christ is not the same thing as being in Christ. Nineveh went to great lengths to show God they feared Him: “And the people of Nineveh believed God. They called for a fast and put on sackcloth from the greatest of them to the least of them” (3:5). Yet, they had no true change of heart.

Justice means “getting what we deserve.” Mercy involves receiving undeserved vindication. All have sinned. And the just punishment for sin is death: spiritual separation from God and eternal damnation. Thankfully, we are granted redemption through salvation under the New Covenant. God loved us enough to ask Jesus to suffer an unbelievable death as a propitiation for our sins. He who knew no sin became sin for us (see 2 Cor. 5:21). His ordeal was so incredibly horrific that it is incomprehensible. Mel Gibson and Jim Caviezel created scenes in The Passion of the Christ that many Christians are unable to watch. It took me three attempts to watch the film through to the end. I find it helpful whenever confronted with premeditated or habitual sin to remember what the last twelve hours of Jesus’ life were like. I also recall Christ saying to “nominal” Christians, “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness'” (Matt. 7:21-23).

Steven Barto, B.S. Psy., M.A. Theology

References

(1) Wayne Grudem, Systematic Theology: An Introduction to Biblical Doctrine (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House, 1994), 217.
(2) Ibid., 219.
(3) Mattew Egwowa, “Characteristics of Determination,” The Guardian: Conscience Nurtured by Truth (Nov. 13, 2016). URL: https://guardian.ng/sunday-magazine/ibru-ecumenical-centre/characteristics-of-determination/
(4) John Bevere, The Bait of Satan: Living Free From the Deadly Trap of Offense (Lake Mary, FL: Charisma House, 2004), 7.
(5) Chris Hoke, Wanted: A Spiritual Pursuit Through Jail, Among Outlaws, and Across Borders (New York, NY: HarperOne), 2015.

Having a “Grace-Receiving” Mentality

Written by Steven Barto, B.S. Psy., M.T.S.

THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF words and phrases we toss around during our lives. Grace is one of those words. Those who have trusted in Jesus for salvation were never meant to live defeated, despairing, boxed-in, unhappy lives; rather to live in victory through grace. In Romans 5, Paul writes of the “abundance of grace” we receive everyday, along with the gift of righteousness, which helps us to reign in life through Jesus. He says, “Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God (Rom. 5:1-2, ESV). God’s grace is bestowed on us without merit. Further, it sets in stone the infrastructure on which we are to live our lives. It is erroneous to imagine that this sacrament—or any other means of grace—operates automatically, as though mere reception were a guarantee (1).

A Proper State of Mind

Paul tells us to do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit (see Phil. 2:2-4). What is comparison if not the means by which we decide we are better or worse than others? Paul said, “For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise (2 Cor. 10:12). He also said, “For, being ignorant of the righteousness of God, and seeking to establish their own, they did not submit to God’s righteousness” (Rom.10:3). Comparing ourselves to others limits our potential. When we compare our performance and actions to others we allow them to set our standard of achievement. Paul reminds us that “everything is possible” for the person who believes (see Rom. 9:23). Nowhere in Scripture does it say one’s success is dictated by his or her stature in the community. Moreover, we are not to compare ourselves to ourselves, or we run the risk of stunting further growth by looking back and saying, “I’ve come a long way. I am nothing like I was before.” This is a recipe for complacency. Rather, we are to compare ourselves to Jesus Christ, aiming every day to emulate Him in all that we do. Grace should propel us to grow in holiness after the pattern of Jesus Christ.

Our path in life can be likened to a tightrope. Consider how tightrope walkers never look back after they take their first step. Seldom do they look up or they would become concerned about how much of their walk remains, making it seem as though they have made little progress. But they do look down, watching their feet, making sure to take measured and accurate steps. Each step, at the moment it is taken, is what is present. It represents what the tightrope walker must do “at that moment.” As Christians, we are not to regret the past, nor should we worry about the future, for in doing so we squander today. Isaiah wrote, “Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert” (Isaiah 43:18-19). Jesus said, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God” (Luke 9:62).

God’s Continuing Grace

God’s grace continues to bless us and keep us after conversion. Jesus is the true human being (wholly man and wholly God) in whom we are to be able to participate by grace. Grace propels believers to grow in holiness after the pattern of Jesus Christ. Peter tells us, “But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity” (2 Pet. 3:18). Johnson believes God’s grace comes to us more like a power, bonding us to Christ so that we may live with Him in accord with our status as God’s beloved children (2). He believes prevenient grace comes to sinners before salvation to convict them of their unrighteousness, call them to repentance, and enable them to freely cooperate with God’s grace by ceasing to resist its work. Other theologians argue that God’s irresistible grace enlightens the minds of sinners, changes their hearts, and draws them to salvation. They’re being led to the living water. Although the condition of beginning the covenant of grace is by faith alone (per fidem), the condition of continuing in grace rests in obedience to God’s commands (3). James said, “So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead” (James 2:17).

It is critical for us to admit how undeserving we are of God’s grace and mercy. When faced with the consequences of bad or illegal behavior, justice is rendered when people “receive their due” according to violation of the law. In fact, justice is “what the accused deserves,” whereas mercy applies kindness and forgiveness to our lives without merit. We receive God’s grace and mercy through Christ, receiving the free and unmerited gift of His righteousness, then begins the practice of recognizing and receiving God’s ongoing grace. There is a often grave misunderstanding that Jesus had one sole mission: to suffer and die for our sins. To be the scapegoat for mankind. The crucifixion of Christ redeems us, but it also must serve to sanctify us as we step out in faith to live as Christ would have us live. Christ is all things to us. He has been made to be our wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption. All glory belongs to the Lord. Our part is to receive Christ as LORD and Savior. He is grace, mercy, forgiveness, direction, righteousness, sanctification, redemption. We cannot complete ourselves any more than we can save ourselves because He is both our redemption and our sanctification. He is all and in all. There is nothing left for us to do or earn. A missionary friend of mine puts it this way: justice is getting what we have coming to us (our just punishment) and mercy is receiving what we do not deserve.

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times? Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay what you owe.’ So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you. He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt (Matthew 18:21-35).

In this parable we learn that God forgives on request without restitution being required. We also learn something important about unforgiveness. The man’s refusal to forward the grace he received resulted in a series of divine consequences. If we remain unforgiving of the unforgiveness of others, we turn back toward legalism. We are being as exacting and demanding as the law; like we are keeping a precise balance sheet on debts owed to us. We selfishly hold everyone to payment in full. This, of course, is an example of justice rather than grace. Unforgiveness is grounded in “debtors-mentality,” a merciless mindset that refuses to release others until they pay all that is due, rather than a “grace-receiving” mentality. When God forgives, He frees the forgiven from all obligation to repay. We have been forgiven and set free as a result of the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Despite this divine explanation of God’s grace, too often we demand forgiveness from those we have wronged as if we can change their heart. Nothing could be more contradictory to the example of Jesus. God didn’t send Jesus into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved (John 3:17). He didn’t come to browbeat sinners, but to set the captives free. The whole of Christianity is about forgiveness, not about holding a “balance sheet” on others.

A Prime Example

A prime example of grace-receiving mentality can be found in John 4. Jesus and the disciples were headed for Galilee. Jesus decided to take a shorter route, which involved going through Samaria despite Jews and Samaritans being sworn enemies. While Jesus rested at Jacob’s well, a Samaritan woman approached to draw water from the well. Jesus asked her for a drink. She responded, “How is it that you, a Jew, asks for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (see John 4:9). Jesus said, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water” (John 4:10). Jesus continued: “Everyone who drinks of this [well] water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (4:13-14). The woman asked for a drink of this everlasting water. The Hebrew word hallomai (to “well up”) occurs only here in John’s gospel and in the Acts of the Apostles. The water that Jesus gives is vibrant and cleansing, and produces the abundant life Jesus was promising to the woman.

Jesus told her to go home and bring her husband, to which she announced that she had no husband. Jesus replied, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband;’ for you have had five husbands, and the [man] you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.” She immediately decided this man must be a prophet. In the Greek and Roman world, for Jesus to possess such knowledge of the woman’s marital history would certify him as a miracle worker, but in the religious world of Israel it would be recognized as the distinguishing mark of a prophet. When she expressed the longing she had for the coming Messiah, Jesus said, “I who speak to you am he” (4:26). It is at this point the woman grasps the magnitude of what Jesus has said to her. It’s as if the very atmosphere changed. Nevertheless, she asked Jesus to “explain everything.” What is this living water? Who is this man, Jesus, that he dares to use the “I AM” remark? Is this man Yeshua? I have no doubt that Jesus chose to travel through Samaria because He knew of the Samaritan woman he would encounter at the well. As she sped off down the hill, spreading the good news through the streets of her village, Jesus told the disciples it was time to go forth and preach the gospel (see Luke 9:1-6).

How to Get It

God’s grace is seen throughout all of creation; in our daily living as well as our salvation. Some believe grace and mercy are synonymous. However, grace is defined as unmerited divine favor or assistance given to us for regeneration or sanctification. Mercy is compassion or forbearance shown, especially to an offender or to one subject to the power of another; leniency or compassionate treatment. It is through grace that God presented His Son Jesus for sacrifice; there is literally nothing we could ever do to earn God’s grace, or to obey the letter of the Law, in order to be saved from eternal damnation. Martin Luther struggled with this concept, becoming increasingly anxious over how he could be clothed in righteousness. Luther initially failed to grasp the meaning behind Romans 1:17: “For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, ‘The righteous shall live by faith'” (ESV). This conflict drove Luther to extremes, such as self-flagellation, remaining outdoors in the winter without a coat or shoes, solitary meditation for days, asking incessantly for God’s forgiveness. He feared he would die in his sleep without having confessed everything. His understanding regarding God’s grace had roots in Roman Catholic teaching: man is justified by God’s grace plus some merit of our own. This, of course, is against Christian doctrine.

Grudem writes, “Justification comes to us entirely by God’s grace, not on account of any merit in ourselves” (4). God’s grace forms believers into the image of Christ in anticipation of their eternal life as God’s beloved children (see Rom. 8:29-30). Because we cannot hope to earn sanctification by obedience to the Law (i.e., through our works), it was necessary for God to provide a means by which we can be redeemed from our sin. God established a covenant with man, setting only one condition: faith alone (sola fide) in Christ alone (sola Christus). God’s grace means His goodness toward those who deserve only punishment. God’s mercy means His goodness toward those who are in misery or distress; God’s patience is manifest in His willingness to withhold punishment toward those who have sinned (5). Because of God’s grace, mercy, and patience cannot be earned, it is reasonable that we provide our bodies (as a living sacrifice), living a life of worship and faith. Regardless of our circumstances, we can have a quiet heart, but this requires total confidence in God. Luther wrote, “Faith is a living, daring confidence in God’s grace, so sure and certain that a man would stake his life on it a thousand times” (6).

Specific to Luther’s trouble with righteousness, he said Romans 1:16 presents the gospel as a power which saves all who believe it. Luther came to believe that Romans 1:17 speaks of God’s righteousness. When we accept Christ as our Lord and Savior, we are clothed in righteousness. When the Father looks upon us, He sees the righteousness of Christ. He separates us from our sins as far as the east is from the west. Luther said, “The righteousness of God is the cause of our salvation… it is called the righteousness of God in contradistinction to man’s righteousness which comes from works” (7). The phrase “from faith to faith” is meant to establish that the righteousness of God comes through, but without ignoring the “works” of our faith as an outward sign to others that we have become a new creation. It is the adage, “We are not saved by good works; we are saved unto good works.” Luther added, “The words ‘from faith to faith’ therefore signify that the believer grows in faith more and more, so that he who is justified becomes more and more righteous” (8). Augustine defined from faith to faith as, “From the faith of those who confess it with the mouth to the faith of those who actually obey it” (9).

In order to receive God’s grace we need first to admit that there is nothing in us that can merit it. We need to honestly admit, “For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out” (Romans 7:18). Jesus didn’t come to justify the godly, but the ungodly. When the Pharisees confronted Jesus about eating with sinners, Jesus said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners” (Mark 2:17). Unfortunately, many Christians forget the importance of God’s grace in their daily walk. The heart of this deception is the belief that after being redeemed by the sole merit of Christ’s finished work, we must then sanctify ourselves. Though seemingly responsible, this denies the grace of Christ. Not only was our redemption purchased by Christ, but also our sanctification. When God places us in Christ, He makes Christ to be all things to us.

According to Peter, grace and peace are multiplied in us through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, and that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness to the end that we may become partakers of the divine nature (see 2 Peter 1:2-3). Peter went on to exhort us to add to our faith moral excellence and to moral excellence, knowledge, and to knowledge self-control, and to self-control, perseverance, and to perseverance, godliness, and to godliness, brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness, love. Many of these things are listed in Galatians 5 as fruits of the Spirit. Paul was who he was by the grace of God. He labored abundantly, but not by his own might or capabilities. He said, “But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me” (1 Cor. 15:10). This is what is meant by having a “grace-receiving” mentality.

References

(1) K.L. Johnson, “Means of Grace” in the Evangelical Dictionary, 3rd. ed. (Grand Rapids, MI: 2017), 358.
(2) K.L. Johnson, Ibid., 358.
(3) Wayne Grudem, Systematic Theology (Grand Rapids, MI: 1994), 519.
(4) Ibid., 729.
(5) Ibid., 200.
(6) Martin Luther, Commentary on Romans (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1954), xvii.
(7) Ibid., 40-41.

Offense Kills!

 

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As humans, we’re easily offended. We fail to understand, however, that offense can become resentment; this, in turn, can lead to anger. Ultimately, unresolved anger can morph into hatred. Hatred, if left unchecked, can destroy us.

Hatred corrodes the container it’s carried in.

John Bevere, in his book The Bait of Satan: Living Free from the Deadly Trap of Offense, tells us the issue of offense is often the most difficult obstacle an individual will face in his or her life. Jesus wisely told His disciples, “…if your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them” (Luke 17:3, NIV). Bevere writes, “Often when we are offended we see ourselves as victims and blame those who have hurt us. We justify our bitterness, unforgiveness, anger, envy, and resentment as they surface. Sometimes we even resent those who remind us of others who have hurt us” (p.10). Hatred actually walls us off—from God and from others. Proverbs 18:19 says, “A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city; and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.”

THE WALLS WE BUILD

We build walls when we are hurt to safeguard our hearts and prevent any future wounds. We become selective, denying entry to all we fear might hurt us. This could not be more true when it comes to romantic relationships. We’ve all heard the phrase, “He comes with a lot of emotional baggage.” Perhaps you’re married and have spent the night on the couch after offending your spouse. Unfortunately, without our knowing, these walls we construct become a prison. We guard our rights and personal relationships carefully. But there is a huge trade-off here. If we don’t risk being hurt, we cannot give unconditional love. We avoid the hurt, yes, but we inadvertently cut off the good as well. I’m a huge Garth Brooks fan. One of my favorite songs by him is The Dance, which brilliantly and poignantly touches on this topic.

Bevere believes when we are offended and in unforgiveness and refuse to repent of this sin, we fail to walk in the knowledge of the truth. We are deceived, and we confuse other Christians and non-believers with our hypocritical lifestyle. We become a spring that spews forth bitter waters. You see, those who are planted in the love of Christ and the will of God will flourish. But those who harbor resentment, anger, and hatred will isolate. They will begin to avoid those with whom they are angry. Social connections will begin to die off. Wither on the vine. They become miserable and their prayer life begins to suffer. The unavoidable result is a faltering relationship with Jesus. This can only lead to a diminished capacity to forgive and to love. This is nothing less than a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Worse yet, offended people begin to believe everyone is out to get them. With this attitude it is difficult for them to see areas in their own lives that need to be changed. God simply did not create us to live alone on an island. We are to love and care for one another. We are social beings. We are flesh and blood, but we are also spiritual. If we stop confronting our own character flaws, we fail to grow. Spiritual perfection is not about being perfect—never making a mistake. If you’re attending a church where that message is taught, it’s time to find a biblical church. Spiritual maturity is about growth. It’s about maturity. When we blame everyone else, we stymie our growth. We fail to see the plank in our own eye. In this regard, we are literally hiding from reality.

THE THREE MOST HARMFUL EMOTIONS

In her book Living Beyond Your Feelings, Joyce Meyer addresses the topic of anger. She says the three most harmful negative emotions are anger, guilt, and fear. She believes anger is number one. When a crime is described as being one of passion, that means it was incited by anger. Anger is such a dangerous emotion that people end up in prison because of what it causes them to do. This begs the question, “Is hate instinctive?” What I do know is unconditional love—true, God-like agape love—comes only from God (see 1 Corinthians 13:4-7). In the flesh, we have no capacity for this kind of love.

Nothing justifies an attitude of hatred. I must admit I’ve hated in the past. I did not get along with my father. I allowed my anger to boil over into hatred. It poisoned my relationship with him. It created a dark film over my eyes; I saw everything he did through that distorted view. It robbed me of the opportunity to learn from him. It caused me to fear and avoid him. Hatred will change your worldview. We see the world not so much as it is but as we are—as we are conditioned to see it. You see yourself and the world in a particular way, mostly based on environmental factors. This is both paralyzing and empowering. It is not uncommon to find yourself wondering How did I get here, to this place, at this point in my life?

Anger shows up in many ways: it criticizes, withdraws, ridicules, humiliates, teases, puts down, strikes out physically (against people and property); it causes poor concentration, bad decisions, a miserable life, depression (when turned inward), drug and alcohol abuse, bullying, passive-aggressive behavior, disrespect. It causes a spike in adrenaline and cortisol, which creates anxiety and the sensation of fight-or-flight. It can lead to headaches, digestive problems, insomnia, high blood pressure, skin problems, heart attack, or stroke.

WHAT ABOUT RECONCILIATION?

Jesus told His disciples, “What you are in your heart is how you really are!” That is quite an accusation. Humility and meekness were paramount to His ministry. So was gentleness and kindness; forgiveness and compassion. He illustrated the importance of letting go of anger and bitter offense. He indicated that not dealing with anger can lead to hatred. Reconciliation was far more important than being right. Obviously, there are limitless scenarios for offense. Maybe the person who offended us was truly wrong. Perhaps we’re convinced of the reasonableness of our anger. We feel justified. However, Jesus exhorts us to reconcile even if the offense is not our fault. It takes maturity to walk in humility in order to bring reconciliation. This is what is meant by being a peacemaker. Romans 14:19 says, “Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification” (NIV).

Reconciliation involves a change in a relationship, either between you and God or between you and another person. It assumes a breakdown in the relationship and a need for restoration. Of course, reconciliation is the objective work between God and man through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross (2 Corinthians 5:19). Reconciliation is also the subjective work between a man and his wife; between a brother and his sibling; between a supervisor and his or her subordinate; between two best friends. We are to pursue that which makes for peace between us. We need to remember that pride is anathema to this process. Pride defends. Pride blames others. Humility agrees, and says, “You’re right. I should not have acted that way. Please forgive me.” This takes Godly wisdom. Paul tells us in Ephesians 5:1 that we are to imitate God.

THE WAR WITHIN

We often feel like a war is going on within us. Our renewed inner man wants to do what we know is right. The apostle Paul fought this battle. He wrote, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the Law is good… for I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing” (Romans 7:15, 16, 19, NIV). The key is learning to understand the difference between flesh and spirit. We need to practice crucifying the flesh daily, walking instead in the Spirit. In newness of life. Scripture tells us that when we receive Christ as our Savior and Lord, He gives us a new nature (see 2 Corinthians 5:17). He imparts to us His nature. He grants us access to a spirit of temperance. He gives us not a spirit of fear but of sound mind (see 2 Timothy 1:7).

This battle also applies to forgiving those who have offended us. Many people—believers and non-believers alike—decide forgiving others is just too hard. They choose avoidance instead. They wallow in unforgiveness. They stew. They allow resentment to build. They become callous. They build walls. Stop making friends. After all, they’ll only get hurt again. People suck, right? But deciding not to forgive can be spiritually crippling. The Bible clearly says that if we don’t forgive others, God will not forgive us (see Matthew 6:14-15). If we allow this to happen, we’re permitting sin to stand between us and God. We will find it difficult to hear His will for us. We won’t be able to sense His presence. I know firsthand that harboring resentment robs us of peace, restful sleep, happiness, relationships, contentment, joy. It affects our physical and mental health. It robs us of our spiritual well being.

Do you have someone in your life that has wronged you? Have you been harboring anger, resentment, unforgiveness? Speak to God about it. Ask Him to forgive you of your unforgiveness. Seek His guidance on how to best approach that individual. Then, when you feel led by the Holy Spirit, go to him or her. And whatever you do, give that person the freedom to be themselves in the same manner you expect to be given the freedom to be you. We’re all children of God. Love and forgive others in the same manner that He loves and forgives you.

References

Bevere, J. (2004). The Bait of Satan: Living Free from the Deadly Trap of Offense. Lake Mary, FL: Charisma House Publishing.

Meyer, J. (2011). Living Beyond Your Feelings. New York, NY: Faith Words

Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture references are from the King James Version.